


Fata Morgana

by aridseas



Series: Cherry Blossom Bonfire [4]
Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Angst, Childhood Friends, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-24
Updated: 2016-09-24
Packaged: 2018-08-16 23:18:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8121463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aridseas/pseuds/aridseas
Summary: The more he attempted to suppress his feelings, the stronger they grew.





	

**Author's Note:**

> For melodyofmysoul on LJ, who wished to see more of Jun's perspective from Cherry Blossom Bonfire.

It was the same dream again.

Sakurai had returned for Masaki after all, astride a magnificent stallion leading some twenty-strong carts of goods from the faraway city which he had hailed from. His purpose for visiting the Shogun again had to do with one reason, and one reason only.

Once again, Jun found himself relegated to the most painful role possible: helping Masaki ready himself for his reunion with Sakurai, watching his radiant smile through the mirror as he brushed and styled his half-brother to exquisite perfectly. He had to listen as Masaki recounted salicious details from his encounters with Sakurai; watch a blush blossom across his face, visible even beneath all the make-up. Still, for all that he was raging internally, his hands continued to move of their own accord, a gentle and supportive touch that only drove Masaki to reveal ever more secrets that left him wanting to cover his ears and scream.

How Sakurai had known all the right places to touch that made Masaki tremble with excitement...

How Sakurai's fingers had probed deep inside, stroking places that had never been explored by any other person...

How Sakurai had licked and bitten at his birthmark as they rocked their hips together, riding waves of pleasure that enveloped them both...

The descriptions were so vivid that Jun could literally visualize the scene in his mind. So vivid, in fact, that there was no need for Jun to picture what it must have looked like; he was suddenly there watching, an actual observer to the unfolding debauchery.

Masaki's already-beautiful features were ever more highlighted by the haze of desire that clouded his eyes and made him flush a pretty pink. His gaze remained half-lidded and trained not upon Sakurai, who was thrusting inside him with skill and deliberation that only a proper man could possess, but on him.

Jun swallowed hard, unable to bring himself to look away even if he could. He could feel a fire building in his loins as he continued to watch their coupling on the floor, on the very same futon that Masaki would sleep in every night and they would wash together. It was an obscene sight, and one that should leave him howling in a jealous rage, and yet... 

His hand drifted downwards until his fingertips brushed against a noticeably hardened bump that had risen underneath the folds of his robes. Jun drew a shuddering breath. He could not believe what he was about to do. 

As he moved to untie his robes for easier access, he suddenly took notice of another change. Though Sakurai was still planted firmly between Masaki's legs, the flexing of muscles in his back and thighs visible with every thrust, and Masaki was still watching his every move, the name which Masaki had been calling was different.

"Jun," he breathed now, with increasing urgency as Sakurai sped up his rhythm, "Nngh... Jun... _Jun_..."

In a flash, Jun was no longer a bystander, but the one plunging into the warm depths of Masaki's body instead of Sakurai as he urged him on with gasps and groans. 

"Masaki..." Jun grunted in response, his body driven by instinct to complete what Sakurai had begun. 

He had been dreaming of this ever since puberty began to take its natural course, leaving him with embarrassing changes in his body in the middle of the night and early mornings. So many times had he been driven to dispose of his erections before Masaki woke up from his sound slumber... so many times had he fought down the urge to have his way with Masaki in the bath as the younger man unknowingly baited him with his nude body at arm's reach...

And now he was finally able to realize what he once thought had been an unattainable dream, made all the more impossible when Sakurai came into the picture.

The build-up in his body was growing too powerful to bear for much longer. His eyes locked onto Masaki's, finding with surprise that they were wide and clear, filled with love and desire for him, Jun, and not Sakurai. 

"I love you," Jun whispered. It was the only time he could ever give voice to his true feelings for the most important person in his life.

Masaki smiled back at him as his lips moved in response. Though soundless, Jun could nevertheless hear those words with clarity, as if Masaki had murmured them directly into his ear.

_"I love you too."_

In an instant, his whole world exploded in a blinding flash of white.

By the time Jun came to with a gasp, he found himself on his back and tangled in a mess of blankets, enveloped by the same darkness which he had gone to sleep with. It was cold outside - winter was creeping up upon them once again - yet he was drenched with sweat as if he had been running for ten miles straight. His robes were particularly damp between his legs, which Jun noticed with a wince. It was not the first time that it had happened. He quickly cast a glance off to his left, where Masaki continued to slumber soundly on his own futon.

Thank goodness for small mercies, Jun thought wryly as he carefully eased his blankets aside so he could rise and do a quick wash before anyone noticed his presence out about in the halls at this hour of the night.

Still, he could not help himself from pausing when he passed by Masaki's futon on his way to the door. His fingers flexed against the new change of clothes under one arm, and he gritted his teeth and cursed his own will— or lack thereof, as he retraced his footsteps slightly and approached the figure lying still on the ground.

He knelt down by Masaki's head with nary a sound and reached out a hand to brush away a lock of hair that had fallen across his face with utmost care. Encouraged by the lack of reaction from him, Jun drew in a breath and leaned in so close he could feel Masaki's warm breath with every exhale, gentle and steady.

_I love you._

Jun closed his eyes and gently pressed his lips against Masaki's.

If he concentrated hard enough, he could almost hear the strains of a whisper with his next exhale, remnants of a dream in which Masaki reciprocated his feelings for a change.

_I love you too._

With a wordless sigh, Jun rose to his feet and turned away. He knew full well that Masaki's heart had been stolen away by another man, that the blood they shared in their veins meant they could never have had a chance to begin with, and that the only way he would ever be able to possess him would be through these torturous dreams of his. 

But it was all that was available to him, and he could never ask for anything more.

 

-END-


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